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archive for April 2013

april, i hardly knew you

Monday, April 29th, 2013

Recipe: roasted cherry tomatoes with mint

Okay, April just sort of whizzed past me over here. I feel as if I’ve been slogging through the month with my head down to meet all manner of deadlines. This weekend was when I could finally (sort of) look up and around and wonder at the month that was. We got outside to enjoy some untracked snow in the backcountry despite the crazy warm temperatures (50°F) and the unrelenting sun. Whew! There is always that one day in spring that takes some getting used to – the transition from winter to summer.

jeremy admires the view of the high peaks in the distance

breaking trail

skiing out as the sun begins to set

And it looks as if April is not leaving without a fight. There is snow forecasted for the last day of the month. I can’t help but worry after the delicate spring blooms and birds that have been trying to make an appearance each week only to get the snowy smackdown from Mother Nature. I imagine anything that has learned to survive in the mountains these many years is half expecting this dance between fire and ice.

our neighborhood fox keeps it on the down low no matter the weather

We had a warm weekend, which was perfect for throwing open the windows and the deck door. Kaweah loves when the deck door is open. She stands just inside the door, just outside the door, and then eventually right across the threshold because that is the best thing ever (in her mind). Our neighbors came over for dinner Sunday evening. It turns out that all four of their birthdays are in April, so I made some celebratory cupcakes.

flourless chocolate hazelnut cupcakes with chocolate ganache frosting

little cakes on a little stand

and a plate of coconut macaroons drizzled in dark chocolate

For dinner, something on the grill seemed appropriate. We served barbecue chicken and a bunch of vegetable sides. One of those sides involves roasted cherry tomatoes with mint, which I had to make last week for a client shoot with Modmarket. Modmarket’s fare is fresh, simply prepared, wholesome, and incredibly good – so I enjoy working with them. They had given me a small container of these minted roast tomatoes, but I made more just in case I needed extras.

all you need: cherry tomatoes, salt, mint, olive oil, pepper

rinse and pat dry

**Jump for more butter**

monkeying around

Wednesday, April 24th, 2013

Recipe: italian sausage pizza monkey bread

It keeps snowing over here. Our snowpack is inching ever closer to the average, which is pretty exciting. We have sunny bluebird days the rest of the week and then HELLO, chance of snow at the start of next week. Right on. It’s ALL GOOD in my book. I’m in that mood – I could trail run, ski, ride in the mud, whatever. April has been a hella busy and exhausting month. My short hair and I are ready for May.

skiing the backcountry trails after a big storm

then there was another storm

kaweah prefers her walkies in the snow

Rest assured, as long as there is snow on the ground, I am still running the oven. I’m not on pinterest much at all except to piece together ideas for a few projects. I figure it’s best for me to avoid spending (wasting) more time on the computer and it really seems as if the majority of recipes on pinterest call for jello, food coloring, cake mixes, and Pillsbury refrigerated biscuit dough. That scares me. But the monkey bread idea was something one could unscarify if you made it all from scratch. Most of the monkey bread recipes I saw were of the sweet variety, but I wanted savory (of course). So that’s what I did.

pizza dough, mozzarella, italian sausage, garlic, butter, mushrooms, spinach

melt the butter and garlic together

grease the pan with the garlic butter

**Jump for more butter**

here baby, there mama, everywhere daddy daddy

Sunday, April 21st, 2013

Recipe: miso-glazed salmon

It was time. I had announced to Jeremy at the end of last summer that I would cut my hair after the ski resorts closed this season. I’m not especially attached to my hair. Whatever length or style it is, it always winds up being pinned or pulled back into a ponytail and/or braid so it doesn’t interfere with whatever I’m doing. But this was the first time I was cutting my hair since I lost it to chemotherapy back in 2008.

last week

For the past few decades, I’ve been in a pattern of growing my hair long for 3-4 years and cutting it very short to donate the ponytail. I was graced with great hair – my dad’s hair. He’s over 70 years old and has merely hints of a few greys in a sea of thick, black, healthy hair. I figured it was the right thing to do to donate that hair every few years so someone else could benefit. After my breast cancer diagnosis in 2007, I was sitting at the end of the table in my surgeon’s office, swinging my legs to release my nervous energy, asking what comes next. He mentioned surgery, chemo, radiation. He told me, “You will lose your nice long hair.”

No I won’t, I thought in defiance. I got it cut and dyed with blue highlights and donated the ponytail. It’s just hair. It’s easy to let it go. I did it all the time.

i’m donating 16-17 inches this time

Two weeks after my first chemo infusion, I was well enough to resume my telemark ski program. I was in the advanced class with some really wonderful women – a few of whom are dear friends to this day. We were chatting over lunch at the ski lodge, our helmets, gloves, goggles, and hats strewn about the tables. I was listening to Leyla when I reached up to my hair to tuck it behind my ears because I had forgotten it was short. But when I grabbed for the hair, it came out without any effort. I looked at my hand and there were maybe forty strands of hair resting on my fingers. My mouth opened, but no sound came out. My eyes met with the eyes of my friends as everyone fell silent. I knew this was coming, I just didn’t know when. “I guess I have an appointment with a hairdresser in Boulder this afternoon,” I smiled.

I pushed it from my mind until class was over and then I drove home, changed out of my ski clothes, and drove to a Cost Cutters in Boulder. There was no need to have anything fancy done. I just wanted my head shaved so I wouldn’t shed everywhere. Hair loss was going to be on my terms, not chemo’s terms. When the hairdresser asked me what I wanted done, I quietly explained to him that I wanted to have my head shaved because my hair was coming out, but that I needed him to be extra careful not to cut me because I was immunocompromised from chemo. He nodded and proceeded to gently shave my head, softly calling me “sweetheart” and saying, “There you go.” I had trouble looking up at the mirror, but I watched it disappear. And I was fine. I didn’t cry. I thanked him, gave him an enormous tip, settled up at the front and put a hat on as I stepped outside the shop into the cold air.

And then I sat in the car and all of the emotion I had held in check welled up out of my chest and into a stream of tears pouring down my cheeks. Everyone told me I was going to lose my hair and I was totally ready for it. Except I wasn’t. I didn’t know that it would sucker punch me the way it did. It wasn’t the hair. It was the feeling of losing control as if all of the rules of my body had changed. I was scared and I felt very much alone. Cancer is a jerk.

the new cut is called an inverted stacked bob

It would be nine months before peach fuzz began to materialize on my head and another couple of months before I observed, “Jeremy, I think my hair is coming back curly!” My once straight, thick, dense black hair was growing back finer, softer, thinner, a shade lighter, and curly. I thought it might return to normal after a few years, as some folks have reported of their experiences, but after I washed out all of the styling from my haircut on Friday it is still the post-chemo hair. What matters is that I have hair I can donate.

My braids and ponytails have been shipped to Locks of Love in the past (several times, in fact). I was going to do it again when my friend, Wendy – who was also donating her hair, looked into charitable organizations that accept hair donations. I know Locks of Love is the de facto hair donation place, but after reading up on their numbers and their wig recipients (primarily children with alopecia and not so much children with cancer), I’ve decided to send my hair to Pantene Beautiful Lengths (which is where Wendy’s hair went). Pantene Beautiful Lengths makes real hair wigs for women with cancer.

That felt good, to be able to donate again. I’m already starting on the next one.

short hair, just in time for summer

That’s probably the most I’ve ever talked about hair since eighth grade. For me, the thing I love most about short hair is how much less time I spend on it. Even though we’re slated to get another foot of snow Monday night (I know, right? could it BE any better?!?!?), these longer daylight hours have my mind fixated on all manner of outdoor fun this summer like hiking, mountain biking, trail running. That means I want to spend less time in the kitchen too. Wild caught salmon are showing up at my local Whole Foods, so you know that’s a good thing.

salmon, miso, mirin, rice vinegar, sesame seeds

mix the miso, mirin, and rice vinegar together

a nice paste

**Jump for more butter**